Begin With Love

Published on: 11-24-2024

Sex has always been a hot topic—now more than ever, as definitions have proliferated and practices broadened. As Seventh-day Adventists, how can we approach this subject in a compassionate, biblical, and practical way?

Perhaps a good way to begin is with love. What is love? Some say, “Love is love.” Others point out that such a statement is circular reasoning, something like saying, “Faith is faith.” As Christians, when we look for the real definition of “love,” we turn to the Bible, where we read, “God is love” (1 John 4:8). So, to truly understand love, we must know who God is, and He reveals Himself most clearly in His Word—the Bible.¹

God Designed Sex

The Bible tells us God created human beings in His image, and as male and female (Gen. 1:27). Thus, He gave us our identity. He shaped every part of our bodies, designing us in such a way that we have the possibility to procreate. Unlike the animals, however, which can reproduce, the sexual act between a man and a woman—husband and wife—has a far deeper meaning than mere copulation. God designed the sexual union to be reserved for the sacredness of intimacy in a lifelong commitment, enjoying the experience within the protection of a marriage covenant. We read in Hebrews 13:4, “Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled” (ESV).²

As we are all too aware, however, we live in a sinful world, and God’s design has become distorted. And when His design is distorted, love is distorted.

In the area of sexuality, there are many distortions. Sadly, these distortions of God’s design have not only become commonplace but are widely celebrated by some. As we consider these growing challenges, our only safety is in the Word of God. Following the Bible as our guiding compass, we can be compassionate, loving, and effective.

Safety in God’s Word

The Bible tells us, “Put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering” (Col. 3:12). There is never an excuse to treat anyone unkindly or rudely—as if they are less than human. All are God’s children, precious in His sight.

We must remember that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Rom. 3:23). Interestingly, just two chapters earlier Paul lists several sins: “sexual immorality, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; . . . whisperers, backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving, unmerciful” (Rom. 1:29-31).

All these sins break our connection with the Savior. Nevertheless, He is more than willing to forgive when we come to Him in true repentance—“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). This verse gives hope—not only will God forgive, but He promises to “cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” We do not have to stay stuck in the sin, “which so easily ensnares us,” but can instead “run . . . the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith” (Heb. 12:1, 2).

Our only safety is in the Word of God. Using the Bible as our compass, we can be compassionate, loving, and effective.

Suppressing Truth

In Colossians 2:8 we read, “Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit.” Some people—even highly respected individuals—will try to twist the words of the Bible. Paul warns us, don’t let anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit. Stay close to the Word of God.

Returning to Romans 1, we notice an important point in verse 18: “For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who suppress the truth in unrighteousness.” There are some, even in the church today, who attempt to suppress the truth found in this passage, particularly verses 24-28:

“Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth about God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator. . . .Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error. Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done” (NIV).

Those attempting to suppress the truth of this passage claim it doesn’t really mean what it says. The Bible, however, is explicit. God asks us to be faithful, sharing the truth of His Word, even if others are against us, denigrate us, or dismiss us.

Proactive Love

It is time to be proactive in love and respect, sharing what the Bible says because it is the way to true freedom. Jesus said, “If you abide in My word, you are My disciples indeed. And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free” (John 8:31, 32).

Jesus came to set the captives free (see Luke 4:18), and this is the calling He gives us today. No one is beyond the reach of His healing hand. There are many beautiful passages giving hope and encouragement, pointing to a better, happier life—a life God intended, as outlined in His Word.

Interestingly, the passage found in 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 in many ways parallels Romans 1:27-31, and ends with a wonderful testimony:

“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.”

“And such were some of you”—past tense. There is power in God’s Word—power to change us as we submit to the Holy Spirit taking control of our lives. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new” (2 Cor. 5:17).

We become new creatures in the Lord. We then have a story to tell, and our story is to bring people into reconciliation with themselves and, most important, with God. As Seventh-day Adventists we have a great responsibility to show care and love for all people and, in that process, point them to the One who can change us all into new creatures in Jesus Christ.

For more Bible-based, practical material, visit humansexuality.org, which includes articles, stories, and many resources, including links to the statements and guidelines on human sexuality voted by the Seventh-day Adventist Church.

¹ This article is abridged and adapted from “Embracing Human Sexuality: Guided by God’s Word,” by Ted N. C. Wilson, in the October 2024 issue of Ministry, International Journal for Pastors,  www.MinistryMagazine.org.